She thought about suicide.
?And as I had made up my mind to take my life, I just couldn't. Why can't I stop? My kids aren't going to have a mom anymore. And I just remember looking up and just know it was no impression, there wasn't a person. It wasn't a being. It was just a feeling. (There was) this very strong feeling in the corner of my room that said, 'Get in the car. Go to the hospital. Get in the car and go to the hospital, now!' I don't know. I can't really explain it. Call it God. Call it a spirit. Call it an angel. Call it an entity... Something more powerful than myself said, 'Go to the hospital.' So I did. ? That started (the recovery), and I was terrified, but I was ready. I was ready.?
Because Dedra was forthcoming with investigators, she only spent seven days in jail. Her children were never taken from her, but her nursing license was.
Now that license is back and she?s a nurse once again, as long as she remains on the five-year recovery program provided for nurses. Dedra is engaged to be married this summer.
This summer also marks three years clean.
?I am a completely different person,? she said. ?A person has to ultimately say to themselves in their heart, ?I'm done. I've had enough, and I'll do what it takes to get better.??